BDSM

Guys who are part of the BDSM scene usually know more than most about consent and how to negotiate it! In many ways, the rest of us could learn a lot about open negotiations, hard limits, safe words, indicating warning signs that might mean ‘stop’ and how to look after each other afterwards. To learn more, contact SM Gays.

www.smgays.org

These behaviours involve skills and experience that have to be learnt and, people being people, the best practices don’t always get followed. BDSM play and relationships are not immune from boundaries being crossed and sexual assault. It can be extremely difficult for players in BDSM communities to speak up about negative experiences because they fear an uninformed or anti-BDSM response or being ostracised from their community. And, it should not be forgotten, that the effect of the Spanner judgements pushed BDSM play underground and often into un-moderated private settings in which practices and behaviours may not live up to the ideal. All these factors create silence around sexual assault.

If you have experienced sexual assault in a BDSM context and need support to talk through your experience confidentially, you will get a welcoming and informed response from Galop’s sexual abuse casework service.

If you‘ve experienced something you didn’t want or you feel confused about what’s happening when you’re having sex in any context, Galop’s specialist service can offer you listening, understanding and support in an informed and confidential way and help you report to the police, if this is what you want.

Contact Catherine on 020 7704 2040 or at catherine.bewley@galop.org.uk